I realized I've been raising my son to be 'a good boy' in ways that were actually femmephobic — teaching him not to cry, to be strong, to not be 'too much.' I'm grieving a little, and also feeling hopeful.

How do I undo the messages I've already passed on? Is it too late? And how do I hold myself with compassion for not having known what I didn't know?

I'm going to have a conversation with my 11-year-old about this in an age-appropriate way. I want him to know that I see things differently now, and that his sensitivity is something I admire.

I came into this workbook thinking femmephobia was something that happened to other people. I leave it understanding it's in the air I breathe, the jokes I've laughed at, the ways I've shrunk myself. That's a big shift.

What other biases are this invisible to me? If femmephobia was so embedded and so normalized, what else am I carrying that I haven't examined?

I'm going to start noticing and naming the feminine things I value — in myself, in my kids, out loud. I've been quiet about these things for too long.