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Introduction

Welcome & How to Use the Workbook

Hopes & Dreams

Congratulations, It's a...

Girl Toys vs. Boy Toys

Socializing Agents

Binary Thinking

Time Out for Terminology

Locating Ourselves

Let's Play A Game

Let's Play Dress Up

Gender Binary vs. Gender Tapestry

Gender Neutral Parenting (Part 1)

Femmephobia

Looking Closer at Toxic Masculinity

Let's Think About Femininity

Feminine Stereotypes

Locating Our Beliefs

Situating Our Beliefs

Rules About Femininity

Femmephobia on the Playground

Tomboys, Girly Girls..

I'm Not Like Other Girls

Killing Barbie

Femmephobia & Sports

Femmephobia in the Media

Femmephobia in the Family

What Feminine Part of Yourself...

Benefits of Femininity?

When Blue is Neutral

Gender Neutral Parenting (Part 2)

Femme-Conscious Parenting

When Femininity Feels Impractical

The Hidden Message

Practicing Femme-Conscious Parenting

Stopping Femmephobia

Imagining Femme-Positive Futures

Evaluation Survey

Glossary

Let's Play a Game
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Let's Play a Game

Content
Glossary

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Activity: Sorting Traits

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Let's play a game!

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Activity: Sorting Traits

Below is a list of traits, characteristics, and adjectives that the gender binary tends to separate as either masculine OR feminine.

Go through the list and mark the ones you think the gender binary trains us to see as feminine 🩷 and the ones it says are masculine 🔵 — not the ones YOU think are feminine or masculine, but the ones that society has put into those boxes.

"Let's Play a Game" header illustration — character in dynamic pose with arm extended, on purple background.
"Let's Play a Game" header illustration — character in dynamic pose with arm extended, on purple background.
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Open the Toggle to try the interactive version!
  • Inept
  • Gossipy
  • Leaders
  • Hierarchy
  • Indecisive
  • Doting
  • Articulate
  • Insecure
  • Communal
  • Guarded
  • Collaborative
  • Soft
  • Confident
  • Attracted to men
  • Vulnerable
  • Emotional labour
  • Submissive
  • Attracted to women
  • Athletic
  • Level-headed
  • Followers
  • Temperamental
  • Vanity
  • Analytical
  • Panicky
  • Passive
  • Serious
  • Male
  • Irrational
  • Muscular
  • Powerful
  • Assertive
  • Attractive
  • Delicate
  • Men
  • Competent
  • Competitive
  • Logical
  • Independent
  • Unathletic
  • Weak
  • Authoritative
  • Practical
  • Aggressive
  • Artistic
  • Enthusiastic
  • Strong
  • High maintenance
  • Decisive
  • Hard
  • Compassionate
  • Excitable
  • Serving others
  • Relationality
  • Frivolous
  • Serving
  • Impractical
  • Hard skills
  • Credible
  • Dependent
  • Subject
  • Object
  • Emotional
  • Dramatic
  • Dominant
  • Deceptive
  • Female
  • Demure
  • Soft skills
  • Scattered
  • Rational
  • Stoic
  • Silly
  • Women

The Gender Binary: …It's Not Just Divided

Okay, what did you notice as you went through the list? Did you notice a pattern with the traits seen as feminine versus masculine?

Perhaps you noticed that many of the masculine traits are `seen as positive, or things all people should want or value (like being a leader, practical, competent), while feminine traits are commonly seen as negative, or at least less worthy or less inspiring than those that are masculine (like dramatic, passive, emotional).

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This is because the gender binary isn't divided equally: it's not just about masculine/feminine, it's also about what we value as a society.

Men and masculinity are placed on top, where they're seen as "better," and women and femininity on the bottom, where they're seen as "worse" (or "less than") (Hoskin, 2020).

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Hierarchy

A way of ordering things or people/groups where those placed higher in the order are seen as more superior and have more power than those placed at the bottom.

The gender binary isn't just divided, it's also a hierarchy.

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In other words, gender isn't just "this versus that" — boy versus girl, man versus woman, or masculine versus feminine. The gender binary is also ranked, resulting in boys, men, and masculinity being seen as BETTER than girls, women, and femininity.

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