Congratulations, It's a…
Let's start at the beginning.
Before a baby takes their first breath, the process of gender socialization begins. This process can start as soon as the baby's chromosomes can be tested or the genitals can be seen.
Based on the baby's sex chromosomes or genitals, society makes a lot of assumptions.
Activity: Noticing Society's Preparation
Activity: Noticing Society's Preparation
What have you noticed about how society trains us to prepare for a baby's arrival? What are the differences we notice when the newborn is expected to be a girl versus a boy?
Consider, for example:
- Decisions around decorating the baby's room
- Buying clothes and supplies
- Talking about the baby's arrival and the kind of person the baby will be
- Nicknames for the baby
- Assumptions about their interests
- The goals or futures we might envision for them
Gender Assumptions Begin Early
Perhaps you reflected on…
🔵🩷 The different colour schemes — blue for a boy's nursery or pink for a girl's.
👗 The frilly, colourful, decorative, "showy" wardrobe picked out for a girl — and the practical, athletic wardrobe picked out for a boy.
💍 How you or others imagine that she will be a good wife and mother who takes care of her family, with a hard-working and loving husband.
✨ People gushing about how beautiful the girl will be, or how strong the boy will be.
How Gender Socialization Works
If you've thought any of these things, you're not alone! Society makes many assumptions about children based on their gender and assigned sex.
These assumptions follow children everywhere they go — from school and friends, to family and the media. Even when parents and caregivers decide to take a gender-neutral approach to parenting, it can be difficult to control and challenge the assumptions and messages children receive about gender from society at large.
Gender Socialization
Altogether, exposure to these assumptions teaches children how they are expected to behave as girls or boys. We call this process "gender socialization."
But, of course, we know that things are never so simple, or so "cut and dry."
In fact, there's no "right" or "wrong" way to be a girl or boy!
© We Are Family, 2026